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Having Fun With Writing Again

It’s not as serious as you think it is. I wish I would have taken this advice.

If it’s not fun you won’t do it. I should know this about myself by now.

A first draft is you telling yourself the story for the first time.

A first draft is not meant to be perfect.

A first draft draws each shape, but it’s up to you to make the picture.

Okay, that last one I just made up.

I have a first draft of my book, 84 Doors. I’ve been working on it for three years, and I’m very proud of myself for getting the entire story down. I’m hesitant to use the word “finally” because it feels like I missed a deadline that was never set by anyone. I don’t have an editor breathing down my neck demanding a certain page count complete. I don’t have a massive audience that’s waiting for the next installment in a beloved series. I don’t have a timeline for when this book will come out in to the world, but I know that it will. I am proud of myself for meeting a meaningful milestone in the process. Nothing more, but also nothing less.

In case you missed it, I announced the blurb for 84 Doors last week. Essentially, my protagonist Kaia Bruzas lives under the ultimate authority of The Board in the year 2334, when all forms of government have failed and all that’s left is the HOA. She wants nothing more than to be recognized by her boss, President of The Board Adeline Wemple. To do this, she’ll need to transfer departments and be in charge of Investigations. It’s not a promotion, and it comes with a test. Kaia needs to handle an Investigations case. A delicate one. One that demands her to read everything thoroughly and do the best work of her life. Melanie Warden is the subject of the investigation. Melanie has spent twenty-five years carrying around a photograph of Kaia’s mother waiting to meet Kaia face-to-face. But Kaia’s mother has been dead since Kaia was eleven. Everything The Board did to Kaia’s family is a matter of public record, but nobody has ever bothered to look.

I jokingly called it a “paperwork thriller”, but it’s speculative fiction. 84 Doors asks: What would it be like for an elected group of your neighbors to control your life? What does it mean to do the right thing, and the right thing for whom? Who do we demonize/scapegoat and why?

Writing this book has taught me that I needed to let go of my desire for it to be a perfect first draft for it to become a first draft. I needed to have fun with the process. I’ve noticed an attitude in the writing community around the discipline of writing. The advice goes, mark your calendar and stick to it. Dedicated writing time is the only way to make consistent progress. While I agree with the sentiment, I question if that’s the best approach for me. As a neurodivergent mom, I rarely have two days in a row that look exactly the same. I’m balancing responsibilities with my energy levels, and hard choices are a daily occurrence. I’ve sacrificed my idea of an uninterrupted writing block more than I’d care to admit. What I can do, is seize the rare moments when I have energy and time to work. I aim for at least an hour, although if it’s nap time I’ll take what I can get. I chose writing for the flexibility. I chose writing because I thrive when I’m ready for the work. And I chose writing because it’s fun.

There’s nothing better than finishing a chapter and reading it to my husband over lunch. I get so excited pacing the room back and forth while I’m reading aloud. Thank you, my dear, for always listening to me when you can and for giving me helpful and kind feedback.

I’m on to the editing stage of this book. I am going to get it as good as I can get it, but then I need a second pair of eyes on it. If you are a writer with manuscript, and you’d be willing to trade editing with me, please reach out via EmeraldQuill.com (contact info is on there!) and I’d be happy to have a conversation about a swap.

I cannot wait to share more of this project with the world. I’m picturing the day when I hold my finished book in my hands. It’s a sweet day. I am happy.

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Hi, I’m Catherine. Nobody tells you that life getting more stable can feel more disorienting. I write about happiness, motherhood, and neurodivergence — for women who thrived in survival mode and then lost their map when things finally calmed down.

You can connect with me on Instagram or TikTok @CatherineEmeraldQuill

If you’d like to support my work, you can Buy Me A Coffee or subscribe to my snail mail club at EmeraldQuill.com